We all carry racist beliefs to some extent
It’s hard to escape racism. Whatever a person’s colour or ethnicity, it’s easy for most of us to believe that a person of another background is different to oneself.
Stereotypes are embedded in society, for example in films, news media, advertising and folklore, and we are all vulnerable to external ideas about race and culture. While racism is endemic in most societies, it is most noticeable when we see the damage it can do to individuals or groups.
The more vulnerable a person is to race-based maltreatment, the more likely a person will be aware of their own difference. A white person in the UK is unlikely to consider what it means to be white, while a black person may be constantly aware of what it means to be black.
Talking about racism and difference
Talking about racism and difference can be uncomfortable. For many people, it is a visceral, very emotional topic. But it is important to talk about it as a society, since we can’t hope to change it if we don’t discuss it.
It is also valuable to discuss racism and difference in therapy. Experiencing racism is horrendous, yet for too many people it is a common occurrence. Being discriminated against on the basis of your skin colour or any other difference is likely to bring up various emotions, such as anger, hopelessness, frustration and sadness. If it happens regularly, some people suppress those emotions because it feels too much to deal with them all the time.
In therapy you can talk about how discrimination has affected you and gradually release the emotions that have been bottled up over the years. It can feel liberating to be heard and understood as you work through the pent-up feelings.
Therapy is not about getting okay with racism. Your anger is justified and a good therapist won’t try to take that away from you. It’s about hearing you and supporting you to be powerful and authentic in spite of the discrimination you face.
Counselling for racism and difference
Therapy is often seen as something white people do. We want to challenge that. We seek diversity in our recruitment and have provided further training for our therapists on working with race and difference.
Some clients prefer to work with a therapist who looks like them and is likely to have experienced similar discrimination. Others are happy to work with someone who is more different from them, and actually it can be very powerful to work with the differences between client and therapist. Either way is fine – what is important is for you to work with someone you feel comfortable opening up to. You can read a little about each of our therapists here.
If race and difference is an issue in your relationship, you may like to see one of our couples therapists. You can find out more about couples therapy here.
Your first appointment can be booked online or by calling us. It is an opportunity to find out if therapy is right for you and to decide whether you wish to continue with your chosen counsellor. They will be happy to refer you to a colleague if the fit doesn’t feel right.
Meet our therapists working with race and racism
