Anger management

Anger is a natural emotion, experienced by all people from time to time

We all feel angry sometimes and that is healthy. Some people find it hard to express their anger in healthy ways, and for those people counselling can be a great support.

It is helpful to distinguish between anger and the behaviours prompted by anger. Although it doesn’t feel very nice, the emotion (anger) isn’t usually problematic; the behaviours associated with anger, however, sometimes are.

Some people become aggressive when they feel angry. They may be physically or verbally aggressive, towards others, themselves or objects. People who become aggressive usually have not learned ways to express their anger healthily. If they grew up in households where anger went unexpressed or was expressed through aggression, they wouldn’t have had a chance to learn healthier approaches to expressing anger.

Other people push their anger down, often because they are fearful that expressing it might be destructive. But that approach doesn’t work. Repressed anger eventually leaks out,  through expressions such as passive-aggressive behaviour, hostility and depression. Many people believe that contained, unexpressed anger can also contribute to serious health problems.

 

How can counselling help with anger problems?

Whether you express your anger through aggression or keep it pushed down, therapy will help by teaching you to express it constructively. This means explaining to others what makes you angry and why. Helping others to understand your perspective can be the first step in changing the situations that make you feel angry. Even if the situation doesn’t change, just speaking up for the angry part of yourself will reduce the anger.

Sometimes our anger is irrational. It may be based on a belief such as People are out to get me or Life should be better than this. This anger can lead to confrontations and push people away in relationships. In these cases, anger counselling will explore where these beliefs have come from and help you to see that they are irrational. That in turn will reduce your anger and improve your relationships.

Client Reviews

Male and female approaches to anger

Typically, men and women deal with anger differently. 

Men are more likely to express their anger as aggression. This may be due to biological factors (including the male hormone testosterone) and/or social factors (aggressive expression of anger being more socially acceptable for men than other emotional expressions).

Women are more likely to have problems with unexpressed anger. They may have been brought up to believe that women shouldn’t express anger or that their angry feelings are unimportant. 

When working with anger, our therapists explore gender-related factors and the part they play for each client.

What to expect in counselling

When I trained as a psychotherapist, me and my fellow students were given the assignment of doing something we’d never done before. The course tutors wanted us to get in touch with how scary it can be to do something new, to feel the fear of the unknown. I chose to …

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What is CBT and can it help?

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is a practical talking therapy that helps people with problems and issues by addressing and changing how they think and behave. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy focuses on the present problems that are happening now and the relationships between thoughts…

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Counselling for individuals

Personal counselling can be about anything that is on your mind.

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Couples counselling

Couples counselling provides space for couples to discuss problems in their relationship and find solutions.

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Our therapists

We have over 30 qualified and experienced therapists to choose from.

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One Therapy London

Counselling, psychotherapy, couples counselling in London since 2006

Roz Urquhart

Roz is a psychoanalytic psychotherapist, who offers both long- and short-term psychotherapy She works with a varied client group offering a welcoming, safe and confidential therapeutic space in which to help her clients explore and process the issues that are bringing them into therapy Roz supports her clients to focus on unconscious processes, inner conflicts and...

Oxford Circus

Natasha Maidment

Natasha is a person–centred counsellor and psychotherapist who will provide you with a safe, empathetic and non-judgemental space to explore any thoughts or concerns you wish to bring She works with a range of issues including anxiety, stress, critical thoughts, trauma, relationship issues, identity, depression, loss and low self-esteem Natasha offers a...

Oxford Circus

Yussef Ferguson

Yussef is a psychodynamic psychotherapist who offers both long and short term personal therapy to individuals He has experience of working with a diverse range of clients and can provide a warm, confidential space to explore and gain insight into any past or present personal difficulties and experiences Yussef works with issues such as anxiety, depression, loss,...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Rhiannon Whipps
Rhiannon Whipps

Rhiannon is a psychodynamic counsellor and psychotherapist with over ten years experience of working within the field of mental health Rhiannon provides an empathic and non-judgemental therapeutic space for her clients to explore any difficulties which they may be facing Within the safety of a confidential environment, she encourages her clients to openly explore...

Soho

Therapist Stamatia Lorentzou
Stamatia Lorentzou

Stamatia draws on a broad range of theories of psychotherapy She works collaboratively with her clients to understand the causes of their concern and find ways to move forward Stamatia offers both short-term and longer-term therapy She has worked in various organisational settings with individuals seeking to address relationship issues, low self esteem, separation,...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Barbara Perini
Barbara Perini

Barbara is an accredited member of BACP, holding an MSc in Psychodynamic Psychotherapy and adhering to the BACP ethical framework Her approach is open-ended, offering both short-term and long-term therapy Barbara has also trained in Dynamic Interpersonal Therapy (DIT), a short-term (16 sessions), semi-structured individual therapy developed for mood...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Catherine Hammett
Catherine Hammett

Catherine offers a safe, confidential space for clients bringing a wide range of issues to therapy  These include anxiety, low self-esteem, relationship difficulties, anger and work-related stress  Catherine also supports clients experiencing depression, bereavement and life transitions  Among her specialist interests are post-traumatic growth and working with adult...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Evan Bates
Evan Bates

Evan is a psychodynamic therapist, offering both long and short term therapy He creates a non-judgemental and reflective space to help clients explore their difficulties and concerns Working together to understand the connections between past and current relationships, Evan supports clients in developing a deeper awareness of their recurring emotional patterns and further...

Soho

Therapist Mita Hiremath
Mita Hiremath

Mita has been involved in the field of counselling and psychotherapy for over 30 years and has a wealth of experience working in the voluntary sector, the NHS and private practice She is a qualified counsellor and psychotherapist Additionally, she holds an MSc in Psychotherapy and is a trained EMDR therapist She has also facilitated support groups in the voluntary...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Silvi Naskinova
Silvi Naskinova

Silvi is a psychodynamic psychotherapist offering both long- and short-term therapy  She aims to provide a safe, supportive and non-judgmental space for her clients to explore whatever is on their minds Her work helps individuals understand how their experiences (both past and present) and any unconscious forces might be impacting their relationships and ways of coping...

Oxford Circus