Relationship issues

Intimate relationships play a central role in the human experience. We have a universal need to belong which is satisfied when close relationships are formed.

In some people, this need to form close relationships is suppressed. Typically this might happen when a person has had a poor experience of relationships and fears being hurt again. Getting emotionally close to someone involves vulnerability and trust, which can be frightening.

Others get into relationships that are ultimately harmful to them. For example, they might subconsciously choose partners who take too much from them or are emotionally unavailable.

All of us tend to repeat patterns from one intimate relationship to the next. Relationships are complex and difficult to navigate. Most of us received no teaching about how to be in relationships; we learnt by observing our parents/caregivers and through our own relationships with them. We adopted patterns of relating that we saw them use or that we needed to adopt to cope with them, whether healthy or unhealthy.

Whatever your relationship issue, counselling can help

If you are in a relationship and the issues you want to address are occurring there, it is probably most beneficial to come as a couple. If that isn’t possible, or if you aren’t in a relationship at the moment, then come on your own – our relationship therapists will be able to help you either way.

If you come as a couple, your counsellor will facilitate discussions between the two of you and will be able to see first hand any problematic dynamics within the relationship. They will help you to understand these and to adopt new ways of relating to each other.

Whether your relationship is gay or straight, monogamous or open, your therapist won’t judge you. Discussions in therapy are confidential. 

Our therapists don’t have an agenda to keep the two of you together; that is up to you to decide. If you choose to end your relationship, counselling can help you to do it with clear communication, without attacking each other or causing unnecessary distress to children if you have them.

Some of our relationship therapists are also trained in psychosexual therapy. If sexual issues are a concern for you, you may prefer to see one of them.

Issues commonly brought to relationship therapy

The issues we frequently see in relationship therapy include:

  • difficulty, or fear of, forming intimate relationships
  • frequent or explosive arguments
  • disagreements over parenting
  • deciding whether to split up
  • infidelity
  • loving one another but not feeling in love
  • communication difficulties
  • sexual dissatisfaction or loss of interest in sex. 

Client Reviews

Taking the next step to improve your relationships

Starting relationship therapy can be difficult. It means facing up to the problems in your relationship and you (or your partner) may feel scared to do that. Often, couples put off coming to therapy until their relationship has reached a point of crisis, when animosity has built up or one partner has already checked out. Counselling is still helpful at that stage, but it’s better to come to therapy before things reach that point.

If you (or your partner) is resistant to starting therapy, an initial consultation may put your mind at ease. You will see that our therapists are supportive and non-judgmental. We choose our therapists carefully, hiring only those who are warm, empathic and knowledgeable. They create a safe space in which you can share your hurts, worries and hopes. They will help you to understand each other and to feel heard. 

There is no obligation to continue with therapy after the initial consultation; it’s your opportunity to decide whether it’s the right thing for you.

You can book your initial consultation online, or contact us here. We want to help.

What to expect in couples counselling

I’m often struck by the anxiety that I see on the faces of clients when they come to their first couples counselling appointment. They are invariably wondering what’s going to happen. Will they have to reveal things they don’t want to say in front of their partner? Will their…

Read more

Facing sexual issues

Sexual issues are common. Sex taps into many different parts of us: the emotional, the physical, the psychological and even the spiritual. The opportunity for something to go wrong in our sexual wiring is great. Most people will experience some kind of sexual dysfunction at some point in…

Read more

Counselling for individuals

Personal counselling can be about anything that is on your mind.

Read more

Couples counselling

Couples counselling provides space for couples to discuss problems in their relationship and find solutions.

Read more

Our therapists

We have over 30 qualified and experienced therapists to choose from.

Read more

One Therapy London

Counselling, psychotherapy, couples counselling in London since 2006

Therapist Barbara Perini
Barbara Perini

Barbara is an accredited member of BACP, holding an MSc in Psychodynamic Psychotherapy and adhering to the BACP ethical framework Her approach is open-ended, offering both short-term and long-term therapy Barbara has also trained in Dynamic Interpersonal Therapy (DIT), a short-term (16 sessions), semi-structured individual therapy developed for mood...

Oxford Circus

Yussef Ferguson

Yussef is a psychodynamic psychotherapist who offers both long and short term personal therapy to individuals He has experience of working with a diverse range of clients and can provide a warm, confidential space to explore and gain insight into any past or present personal difficulties and experiences Yussef works with issues such as anxiety, depression, loss,...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Mita Hiremath
Mita Hiremath

Mita has been involved in the field of counselling and psychotherapy for over 30 years and has a wealth of experience working in the voluntary sector, the NHS and private practice She is a qualified counsellor and psychotherapist Additionally, she holds an MSc in Psychotherapy and is a trained EMDR therapist She has also facilitated support groups in the voluntary...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Janis Dellner
Janis Dellner

Janis offers an empathic, non-judgmental and safe environment where her clients can explore the issues that are currently troubling them  Janis works collaboratively to explore and challenge thoughts, feelings and behaviours that are no longer serving her clients’ wellbeing, interests and relationships with themselves and others  She believes it is through the...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Silvi Naskinova
Silvi Naskinova

Silvi is a psychodynamic psychotherapist offering both long- and short-term therapy  She aims to provide a safe, supportive and non-judgmental space for her clients to explore whatever is on their minds Her work helps individuals understand how their experiences (both past and present) and any unconscious forces might be impacting their relationships and ways of coping...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Ben Marks
Ben Marks

Ben is an experienced psychotherapist who has helped many people through difficult times in their lives He works with clients with a wide range of personal issues around depression, anxiety, bereavement, trauma, abuse, loneliness, stresses within the workplace, low self esteem, relationship and sexual problems including performance anxiety, erectile dysfunction and...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Nicola Reeves
Nicola Reeves

Nicola is a psychodynamic psychotherapist and EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) therapist Nicola believes in giving clients time and space to approach therapy in the way they need to approach it She finds this is the best way to develop a therapeutic relationship that allows feelings to be truly explored and evaluated As a psychodynamic...

Soho

Therapist Asma Gharbi
Asma Gharbi

Asma offers psychodynamic, humanistic and integrative therapies to individuals and couples She tailors her approach to meet the needs and preferences of her clients She offers short and long term therapy Asma provides a non-judgemental space for her clients, where they can feel safe to explore their feelings, make sense of their experiences and forge deep lasting...

Oxford Circus

Kensington

Therapist Shelly Klein
Shelley Klein

As a psychodynamic therapist Shelley brings a wealth of experience to her work and supports her patients to talk about those aspects of their lives they are finding painful, upsetting or difficult to deal with, in a confidential, non-judgmental and peaceful setting Shelley is particularly interested in working with those who are experiencing depression, bereavement, high...

Soho

Therapist Tom Deitch
Tom Deitch

Tom is a popular and approachable psychotherapist who has extensive experience working with people from a variety of social and cultural backgrounds He brings a wealth of life experience, training and understanding to his work, offering help with depression, trauma, anxiety, abuse, sexual problems, addiction, relationship difficulties and many of the other obstacles life...

Oxford Circus