Bereavement counselling

For many of us, bereavement will be the most distressing experience of our lives.

Unsurprisingly, bereavement is one of the most common reasons people seek therapy: the death of a loved one can be devastating. An experienced therapist will support you through the difficult process of grieving and help you come to terms with your loss.

Understanding grief

Grief is how we feel when we lose someone we care about or something we value. It affects everyone. It is painful and stressful but also natural, normal and necessary.

Everyone experiences grief differently and there is no normal or right way to grieve. How we react is influenced by many things including our age, culture, religious beliefs and previous experiences of bereavement.

The way in which a person died may also have an impact on the grieving process: was the death by natural causes, an accident or suicide? Was the death sudden or expected? Could the death have been prevented if circumstances had been different?

Grief also changes over time. Reactions and feelings can change from hour to hour. Some people find these mood swings very frightening.

The stages of grief

People sometimes talk about the five stages of grief. These are:

  • denial – finding it hard to believe that your loved one is gone
  • anger that the person is gone, which may be directed at them, yourself, doctors, God, etc
  • bargaining – ruminating on if onlys and what ifs, trying to find ways the death could have been prevented
  • depression – feeling very low and empty, perhaps seeing little point in carrying on
  • acceptance that the death has happened and life must move on.
However, people rarely go neatly through these stages in order. More realistically, there is a lot of moving back and forth between stages. Some people try to rush through the stages, or to skip straight to acceptance. Grief cannot be rushed; the important thing is to allow yourself to feel what you feel, at your own pace.

Put your well-being in our experienced hands

We have helped many people come to terms with the loss of a loved one.

Our clients have reported great results!

Mr K
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“I was attending sessions at One Therapy practice for about 1 1/2 years. I am very happy with the result, sessions there really helped me. I am really grateful to my therapist. Someone recommended him to me as a high professional and it proved right, thank you.”
Mrs M
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“I can only provide positive comments on my sessions with (my therapist). This was my first experience with a therapist, and she managed to make me feel comfortable. And I must say that the sessions were helpful and efficient.”
Mrs E
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“My therapist was extremely helpful, considerate and understanding. I felt she properly understood what the issues I had were, and their underlying causes, and I feel I benefited considerably from the sessions with her.”
Mrs N
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“I immediately felt completely at ease as they were very professional while showing genuine care and interest in helping me. I was able to confront many issues which I had so far chosen to ignore despite their negative effects on my personal relationships and happiness. I would have no hesitation in recommending (One Therapy) to anyone looking to improve their relationships and self-esteem.”
Mrs L
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“I learned a lot about myself and about the relationships I make with other people. I was able to see where I was going wrong and I now make better personal choices. Thank you, again.”
Mrs R
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“I can’t thank you enough for the help and support I got from my appointments. I would highly recommend therapy to anyone now. Therapy helped me in more ways than I could have imagined. Please tell (my therapist) how grateful I am for her help.”

Coping with loss

When someone close to you dies, there is a lot of change for you to come to terms with. The person you love is no longer part of your world. You may have to let go of dreams you had of your future with them. You may need to take on additional responsibilities now that they are not around. Or you may now have more time for yourself if you were caring for them. You may find your own grief is pushed aside so that you can support others who are also grieving. It’s a lot to deal with and it can feel overwhelming. 

If you are also handling practical matters around the death, it can feel even worse. People are often surprised by the volume of admin around death, how long it goes on and how unbearable it can feel to have to deal with practical matters when you are already in pain.

With such a lot to deal with, there are a host of different emotions as you go through grief and loss. Some of the most common are:

It can take some time for the reality of the death to sink in. You don’t want to believe that someone you love has died. The reality can feel almost too much to bear.

You’ve lost so much – the person, their love, their friendship, their companionship, intimacy, opportunities and hopes. And this loss may bring tremendous feelings of sadness.

You may feel guilty about things you said or did, or things you didn’t say or do. You may also feel guilty that you are still alive, or that you have times when you feel happy or when you focus on something other than your loss.

Death can seem very unfair. Many people find it difficult to make sense of personal loss.

It’s natural to feel angry about what has been taken from you – the person who has died and the future you would have had with them. You might feel angry with yourself too, for what you did or did not do before they died. But perhaps most difficult of all, you might feel angry with the dead person for dying and abandoning you and for the pain you are suffering as a result of their death.

Grieving can be a lonely process. You may feel that no one can possibly understand what you are going through. And you may feel reluctant to talk to friends about how you’re feeling. Many people are awkward around the topic of death, so it can be hard to find someone who will be alongside you in your grief.

Grieving can bring on both physical and mental pain which can be overwhelming and frightening. Some people are surprised at how painful grieving can be.

You might feel relieved, especially if the death follows a long illness or if the person’s life had been difficult or uncomfortable in their final months.

Sometimes people worry that they’re not feeling enough about a death. They wonder why they’re not crying as much as those around them. It may be that they are subconsciously numbing their feelings. 

How bereavement counselling can help

Bereavement counselling will help you to process the complex feelings you may go through in your grief. They can be overwhelming at times, hard to get in touch with at other times, and often confusing. Talking to one of our London therapists will really help.

At a time when it can be hard to turn to friends and family, who may be going through their own grief, therapy provides a precious space where you can express yourself freely.

Our therapists aren’t awkward around death. They can hear your pain and anger without judging you or feeling overwhelmed by it.

Many people worry that grief will go on forever.  With the support of your therapist, the pain will gradually lessen and you will find a new way of living.

Both face-to-face and online counselling are available.

What to expect in counselling

When I trained as a psychotherapist, me and my fellow students were given the assignment of doing something we’d never done before. The course tutors wanted us to get in touch with how scary it can be to do something new, to feel the fear of the unknown. I chose to …

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What do I talk about in counselling?

One of the most common worries I hear expressed by people starting counselling is that they won’t know what to talk about. Some people think their problems aren’t significant enough. Others fear they have too much to say, that they might overwhelm the therapist…

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Counselling for individuals

Personal counselling can be about anything that is on your mind.

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Couples counselling

Couples counselling provides space for couples to discuss problems in their relationship and find solutions.

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Our therapists

We have over 30 qualified and experienced therapists to choose from.

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One Therapy London

Counselling, psychotherapy, couples counselling in London since 2006

Therapist Andreea Gligore
Andreea Gligore

Andreea has a wonderful ability to put people at ease Her clients say they feel safe and relaxed with her Those who were anxious about coming to therapy often comment that she made it much more comfortable than they were expecting Her style is integrative-relational What that means is that she pays particular attention to relationships, as that is where most distress...

Oxford Circus

Kensington

Therapist Roz Urquhart
Roz Urquhart

Roz is a psychoanalytic psychotherapist, who offers both long- and short-term psychotherapy She works with a varied client group offering a welcoming, safe and confidential therapeutic space in which to help her clients explore and process the issues that are bringing them into therapy Roz supports her clients to focus on unconscious processes, inner conflicts and...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Amrita Athwal
Amrita Athwal

Amrita works with adults in an integrative way, drawing on various therapeutic approaches tailored to meet the needs of each client She provides a safe space to help clients better understand themselves She offers short term and long term therapy Amrita has experience of working with clients on issues such as trauma, addiction, depression, anxiety, relationship...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Natasha Maidment
Natasha Maidment

Natasha is a person–centred counsellor and psychotherapist who will provide you with a safe, empathetic and non-judgemental space to explore any thoughts or concerns you wish to bring She works with a range of issues including anxiety, stress, critical thoughts, trauma, relationship issues, identity, depression, loss and low self-esteem Natasha offers a...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Geraldine Lothian
Geraldine Lothian

Geraldine (she/her) is a psychodynamic psychotherapist who works with individuals Geraldine’s style of therapy is to work collaboratively with her clients and at each client’s pace  It is sometimes difficult to make the decision to start therapy but Geraldine works together with her clients to address any issues that may feel difficult to explore on their own ...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Stamatia Lorentzou
Stamatia Lorentzou

Stamatia draws on a broad range of theories of psychotherapy She works collaboratively with her clients to understand the causes of their concern and find ways to move forward Stamatia offers both short-term and longer-term therapy She has worked in various organisational settings with individuals seeking to address relationship issues, low self esteem, separation,...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Ben Brackenbury
Ben Brackenbury

Ben believes that at times we all struggle with the challenges life has to offer and therapy provides a safe, confidential, non-judgemental space to explore this Ben works with individuals to make sense of who they are and how they respond to the world today, and to explore new ways of being Ben is also sensitive to how difficult it might be for a client to talk to a...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Toulla Nicolaides
Toulla Nicolaides

Toulla is an integrative relational therapist using a combination of therapeutic approaches to help her clients She provides a safe and supportive environment for individuals to explore their difficulties in life, relationships and childhood and to share and resolve confusing and overwhelming feelings Toulla believes that, though challenging, therapy can help clients...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Janis Dellner
Janis Dellner

Janis offers an empathic, non-judgmental and safe environment where her clients can explore the issues that are currently troubling them  Janis works collaboratively to explore and challenge thoughts, feelings and behaviours that are no longer serving her clients’ wellbeing, interests and relationships with themselves and others  She believes it is through the...

Oxford Circus

Therapist James Eve
James Eve

James is a psychosexual and relationship therapist who has been in private practice for five years He works with individuals and couples on sexual and relationship difficulties, understanding that these can be significant causes of distress in one's life Prior to working in private practice, James worked for the psychosexual team at Croydon University Hospital He is a...

Oxford Circus