Sexual problems

Sexual problems affect many people, but we don't tend to talk about them. They are often experienced as isolating and very distressing.

Sex is complex. It has biological, psychological and emotional components. Some sexual problems are purely physical, resulting from a disability, an illness or side effects from medication, for example. Your GP can discuss options for treatment of these types of sexual problems.

However, most sexual problems are psychological.

Why is sex difficult for many people?

Sexual problems are typically caused by one or more of:

  • growing up hearing negative messages about sex, for example that it is dirty or immoral
  • poor sex education
  • past sexual trauma
  • hormonal changes, for example during pregnancy or menopause
  • previous negative sexual encounters
  • relationship issues
  • low self-confidence
  • anxiety
  • difficulty relaxing

Anxiety plays a large part in sexual problems. It is very hard to have enjoyable, satisfying sex if you are anxious. For this reason, sexual problems tend to be cyclical. Once you have a bad sexual experience, anxiety about it happening again can make it harder to relax and enjoy your next sexual experience.

Another key factor is the fact that sex and sexual problems are not openly discussed in our society. People experiencing sexual problems often don’t realise just how many other people are going through the same thing, or that sexual problems can be successfully treated. 

In relationships, discussing sex can feel awkward and scary. People will often avoid sex rather than discuss it. This allows problems to fester and worsen with time.

When two people with differing libidos and sexual preferences come together in a relationship, there are bound to be some points of friction. One partner may want to try sexual acts that the other isn’t comfortable with. One may want to open up the relationship while the other prefers monogamy. Or one partner may simply want sex more often than the other. Sometimes these differences can be worked out, but sometimes they cause the sexual relationship to break down.

Client Reviews

Counselling for sexual problems

Counselling for sexual problems can be undertaken on your own or with your partner. It can be with a psychotherapist, a relationship therapist or a psychosexual therapist. Psychosexual therapists have had further training in sexual issues and are knowledgeable in how to treat particular sexual issues. These include:

  • loss of desire
  • premature ejaculation
  • painful sex
  • erectile problems
  • vaginismus
  • inability to orgasm.
Whichever therapist you see, you will be treated with respect, empathy and warmth. Our therapists won’t judge you for your sexual preferences, your sexual experience (or lack of) or anything else. We are experienced in working with a wide range of sexual practices, including gay and straight, kink and polyamory. If you prefer to speak to a male or female therapist, just let us know when setting up your first appointment.

The thought of discussing sex with a stranger may be off-putting. Experienced therapists are used to these sensitive conversations. They use straightforward, culturally-appropriate language and quickly put you at ease. Most clients are surprised by how quickly their initial anxiety is alleviated. Counselling sessions are always confidential.

To take the next step, please contact us.

You need not suffer with your sexual problem alone – let us help

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Counselling for individuals

Personal counselling can be about anything that is on your mind.

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Couples counselling

Couples counselling provides space for couples to discuss problems in their relationship and find solutions.

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Our therapists

We have over 30 qualified and experienced therapists to choose from.

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One Therapy London

Counselling, psychotherapy, couples counselling in London since 2006

Roz Urquhart

Roz is a psychoanalytic psychotherapist, who offers both long- and short-term psychotherapy She works with a varied client group offering a welcoming, safe and confidential therapeutic space in which to help her clients explore and process the issues that are bringing them into therapy Roz supports her clients to focus on unconscious processes, inner conflicts and...

Oxford Circus

Natasha Maidment

Natasha is a person–centred counsellor and psychotherapist who will provide you with a safe, empathetic and non-judgemental space to explore any thoughts or concerns you wish to bring She works with a range of issues including anxiety, stress, critical thoughts, trauma, relationship issues, identity, depression, loss and low self-esteem Natasha offers a...

Oxford Circus

Yussef Ferguson

Yussef is a psychodynamic psychotherapist who offers both long and short term personal therapy to individuals He has experience of working with a diverse range of clients and can provide a warm, confidential space to explore and gain insight into any past or present personal difficulties and experiences Yussef works with issues such as anxiety, depression, loss,...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Rhiannon Whipps
Rhiannon Whipps

Rhiannon is a psychodynamic counsellor and psychotherapist with over ten years experience of working within the field of mental health Rhiannon provides an empathic and non-judgemental therapeutic space for her clients to explore any difficulties which they may be facing Within the safety of a confidential environment, she encourages her clients to openly explore...

Soho

Therapist Stamatia Lorentzou
Stamatia Lorentzou

Stamatia draws on a broad range of theories of psychotherapy She works collaboratively with her clients to understand the causes of their concern and find ways to move forward Stamatia offers both short-term and longer-term therapy She has worked in various organisational settings with individuals seeking to address relationship issues, low self esteem, separation,...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Barbara Perini
Barbara Perini

Barbara is an accredited member of BACP, holding an MSc in Psychodynamic Psychotherapy and adhering to the BACP ethical framework Her approach is open-ended, offering both short-term and long-term therapy Barbara has also trained in Dynamic Interpersonal Therapy (DIT), a short-term (16 sessions), semi-structured individual therapy developed for mood...

Oxford Circus

Therapist Catherine Hammett
Catherine Hammett

Catherine offers a safe, confidential space for clients bringing a wide range of issues to therapy  These include anxiety, low self-esteem, relationship difficulties, anger and work-related stress  Catherine also supports clients experiencing depression, bereavement and life transitions  Among her specialist interests are post-traumatic growth and working with adult...

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Therapist Evan Bates
Evan Bates

Evan is a psychodynamic therapist, offering both long and short term therapy He creates a non-judgemental and reflective space to help clients explore their difficulties and concerns Working together to understand the connections between past and current relationships, Evan supports clients in developing a deeper awareness of their recurring emotional patterns and further...

Soho

Therapist Mita Hiremath
Mita Hiremath

Mita has been involved in the field of counselling and psychotherapy for over 30 years and has a wealth of experience working in the voluntary sector, the NHS and private practice She is a qualified counsellor and psychotherapist Additionally, she holds an MSc in Psychotherapy and is a trained EMDR therapist She has also facilitated support groups in the voluntary...

Bloomsbury

Therapist Silvi Naskinova
Silvi Naskinova

Silvi is a psychodynamic psychotherapist offering both long- and short-term therapy  She aims to provide a safe, supportive and non-judgmental space for her clients to explore whatever is on their minds Her work helps individuals understand how their experiences (both past and present) and any unconscious forces might be impacting their relationships and ways of coping...

Oxford Circus